Running with scissors
by Literaturefangirl
Summary: This is a story of how I think General Skarr lost his eye in Evil Con Carne. I was inspired to write this when I paused the theme song of the show and saw a label that pointed to General Skarr's scar and it said "Running with scissors".


**Running with scissors**

* * *

Near the base of a temple on Hector Con Carne's island, Hector Con Carne's troops, the man himself and Major Doctor Ghastly stood in front of a satin ceremonial ribbon tied across the orifice of the rabbit shaped cave, that Hector called his 'lair'.

"Where is Skarr?! He is late for the ceremony. I didn't fully furnish the lair for nothing you know." Hector complained to Doctor Ghastly.

The Doctor simply shrugged.

"Major Doctor Ghastly, would you _please_ tell him to come quickly? I am losing my patience." Hector insisted.

"Gotcha Chief."

Major Doctor Ghastly cleared her throat and from out of nowhere, pulled out a megaphone and yelled. "SKARR! HURRY UP AND GET HERE, WITH THE CEREMONIAL SCISSORS!"

The Doctor's shrill voice, reverberated across the lair.

* * *

General Skarr, who was already running towards the entrance of the lair, heard Doctor Ghastly's voice and quickened his pace.

His face was red, his breath heavy from the exertion. In his right hand, he carried a pair of golden scissors.

He soon neared his destination, but just before he crossed the ribbon, Fate intervened and he tripped.

The scissors lodging themselves in his right eye.

A scream could be heard from Doctor Ghastly's direction.

"AHHHHH! MY EYE! Oh the agonizing paaain..." General Skarr screamed, the scissors falling from his eye and landing on the floor, General Skarr's body followed as he keeled over.

"SKARR!" Hector exclaimed, seemingly out of concern for the general.

Boskov's rushed over to General Skarr.

"Look what you've done! You've gotten blood all over the ceremonial scissors!" Hector scolded the general, revealing his true sentiments.

With the last of his strength, General Skarr lifted his head feebly and grimaced, his right hand clutching his wounded eye. He lifted his left arm and raised a finger, his arm trembling and he apologized with a hint of sarcasm. "S-sorry sir, it won't happen again."

His strength finally failed him and General Skarr collapsed with a thud and passed out.

"What do we do now, Chief?" Doctor Ghastly asked.

"I suppose we could just clean the blood off the scissors and I could cut the ribbon myself."

"Oh I meant about the General, but great idea Chief!" Doctor Ghastly praised her leader.

And so Doctor Ghastly picked up the bloody scissors beside General Skarr's body and walked over to the beach and rinsed the scissors in the sea water.

She then walked back to the ceremonial ribbon and handed the scissors to Hector.

Hector then cut the ribbon. The troops then cheered and they all raced to go inside the fully furnished lair.

* * *

General Skarr opened his eyes, his vision blurry and unfocused. His eyelids struggling to stay open.

He was in an infirmary bed and dressed in an infirmary gown. His face had a pink lighting bolt shaped scar on it, just under his right eye. The latter appeared to be made out of glass. Doctor Ghastly stood near his bed.

Then it dawned on him, his right eye couldn't perceive anything, everything was black! He felt something cold and smooth in his right eye socket.

"WHAT HAPPENED TO MY EYE?!" General Skarr screamed with anger.

"Well you see General, it just fell out and I had to replace it with a glass one because after Hector cut the ribbon the troops trampled all over your eye and it was unsalvageable." Doctor Ghastly explained.

"So what you're telling me, is that you were able to preserve that cretin Hector's brain and stomach perfectly, yet you couldn't even save a TINY eyeball?!" General Skarr concluded.

"That's correct." Doctor Ghastly answered in a strangely optimistic voice.

Skarr groaned.

"Well look on the bright side! Now you look like a pirate, isn't that great?" Doctor Ghastly consoled the General.

"Oh joy..." Skarr quipped sarcastically and rolled his eyes as Doctor Ghastly left the room.

* * *

**Thank you for reading my story, please let me know what you thought of it. Thank you.  
**


End file.
